How to Bust Stress and Fears

How to Bust Stress and Fear

You know that stress is bad for you. Yet you endure it every day. Modern life is stressful. Whether it’s work, your boss, your spouse, your kids, your parents, driving or simply trying to fathom what to eat today. Your life is filled with stressors. So what can you do about it?

Imagine you are visiting a theme park

The best rides always have a long queue and you look with disdain at a group of ‘bullies’ who cut the line and push in front of you.

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5 areas of stress and anxiety in your life

Stress and anxiety. It can smack you in the head when you least expect it.

It can creep up on you and before you realize what has happened, your skin tingles, your heart is racing, your breathing shallow and you are ready to lash out at your nearest and dearest for minor offenses.

In previous oists, I have explained what happens in your brain and the different types of stress. Now lets look at the 5 areas in your life that are affected by stress. The more we know about our own peculiar stress response, the more readily we can deal with it effectively.

16 JourneyThe first area of life we’ll look at is the Journey.

Your journey is your path through life – it’s your story, your memories, your history, your beliefs,values, purpose and calling. Stress in this area is often caused by the lack of something or an imbalance in our journey in life and the choices we have made. For many, it is a lack of defined purpose – quaintly referred to as a “mid-life crisis” (should be) where we suddenly start asking ourselves “what’s the point of all of this?” (alone). Stress here can also be tied to our memories and history of fear and worry in the past and triggered in the present.

42 DoingThe second area of our life, we call “Doing”. This is the sphere of action and reaction – the practical aspects of our life. Stress and anxiety in this area can be caused through a feeling of overwhelm or overload because we believe we cannot do what is necessary (persistence) – or perhaps we have simply taken on too much. Perhaps we feel that the risk of action is too great and the alarm bells ring that perhaps our goal is too stretching (almost)?

68 Just BeThe third area we call “Just Be”. This is our emotional being and the way we flow through life. Stress in this area may be caused because we hold on to grievances and bitterness (forgiveness) about others and about ourselves. Perhaps you are being asked to compromise your values or authenticity in order to succeed in this fallen world. Our chosen attitude (gratitude) towards life has a major impact on how we respond to stressful situations.

DifficultyThe fourth area is “Difficulties”. This is the challenging aspects of our lives. As we journey through life we all face difficulties and challenges (failure) – how we approach these can determine the stress and anxiety we feel as we choose how we avoid or overcome our challenges. We may feel guilty about our failure or perhaps we just hold our own “pity party” (self-pity) as we make excuses for being stuck.

120 OpportunitiesThe fifth area we examine is “Opportunities”. How we go about enriching our daily lives, how open and ready we are to things that happen around us can have a significant impact on our levels of stress and anxiety. Perhaps a different point of view will enable us to align ourselves and innovate a way to succeed.

Our stress can be rooted in one or all areas. The way these life areas interplay in our thinking and emotions enable us to choose to cope with or overcome the stressors that life does, and will continue to, present. As we dig a little deeper into our personal response to life happening, we learn what triggers our own stress and anxiety. And once we know the enemy, we can prepare for every battle in our war on stress and anxiety.

Stop Stress and Anxiety

Anxiety or stress versus Fear

Fear and anxiety and stress are close cousins yet distinct from each other.

Fear, evolutionary speaking, is a useful, protective trait critical for survival. It sharpens our senses and prepares our body to face sudden danger. Critically, fear is our response to a real threat and imminent danger. Fear has a cause that is both tangible and present and is usually something specific.

Anxiety is usually a fear of an indefinite something that we cannot always explain or even locate in space and time.

Stress is the way our bodies and minds react to something which upsets our normal balance in life. Stress is how we feel and how our bodies react when we are fearful or anxious. Some level of stress has some upside to mind and body function to enable us to react in a positive way. Too much stress though, is both harmful to the body and our performance. How much is too much? Well, that depends… on you and how you respond.

As fear is a critical survival mechanism in response to a real threat, stress from fear is something to be tolerated in order to survive. Anxiety, on the other hand, is fear looking for a reason.

Anxiety is fear looking for a reason.

In the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM) there is a category for “General Anxiety Disorder” (GAD). Diagnostic criteria for GAD are: Excessive and difficult-to-tame anxiety and worry occurring more days than not for at least 6 months about a number of events or activities. And you have 3 or more of the following symptoms:

  • Restlessness or feeling keyed up or on edge
  • Being easily fatigued
  • Difficulty concentrating or mind going blank
  • Irritability
  • Muscle tension
  • Sleep disturbance

Also, the worry should not be about something specific.

Manifest symptoms cause clinically significant distress or impairment in social, occupational or other important areas of functioning in life.

As you read through the clinical diagnosis, if you think, “yeap, that’s me”, you need to stop right now and book an appointment to visit your doctor. So, just check the details again, is your anxiety occurring more days than not? At least 3 of the symptoms? IS your anxiety causing you significant distress? Again, if your answers are yes, you need to seek professional advice.

Anxiety is the tacit awareness that something is missing or wrong in our lives or that our values an aspirations are out of focus or under threat.

Active versus passive fear

Taking action in response to threatening stimuli enables us to engage in active oping strategies instead of a fearful response. The central nucleus of the amygdala plays a critical role here. Specifically, “Type 1” cells in the Central Nucleus (CeA) that, when activated, inhibit transmission activity. When inhibited, the CeA is selectively silenced. This silencing is linked to activity in the frontal region of the brain (the Cholinergenic basal forebrain) which is known for its arousing influence on parts of the brain cortex. In short, silence the CeA and you more actively seek a way out of a threatening situation.

The bed nucleus of the stria terminals (BNST) mediates slower-onset, longer-lasting responses that frequently accompany sustained threats, and that may persist even after threat termination. Continuing the feeling of anxiety.

It is possible to bypass, or at least significantly reduce, the anxiety experience by training ourselves to use alternate pathways.

We can avoid being gripped by anxiety. Not by withdrawing from life, but by actively choosing to negotiate ourselves away from negative thinking and engaging in more pleasurable activities and constructive behaviour.

So why do we persist in ever being anxious?

We worry because we think that worrying is the most useful, and sometimes the only apparently useful, strategy and keeps us preoccupied and safe. I.e. it keeps us from taking action to deal with the situation.

If we want to beat anxiety, we must be disciplined to exercise our incredible capacity to conquer it with calm and positivity. Every time we purposefully take action towards change, we contribute to the creation and consolidation of new behavioural responses and the underlying neural circuits that can bypass our anxious response.

Your Brain on Stress and Anxiety – Infographic