The Elephant and Rider – How to Influence Change

How to Influence ChangeHave you ever wondered why it’s so tough to influence change?

Why is it, that with our very best intentions, we still find it difficult to make changes that we know would be good for us? It seems that it’s down to our inner elephant.

I’ve borrowed the analogy used by University of Virginia psychologist Jonathan Haidt in his wonderful book The Happiness Hypothesis. Haidt says that our emotional side is an Elephant and our rational side is its Rider. Perched atop the Elephant, the Rider holds the reins and seems to be the leader. But the Rider’s control is precarious because the Rider is so small relative to the Elephant. Anytime the six-ton Elephant and the Rider disagree about which direction to go, the Rider is going to lose. He’s completely overmatched.

Most of us are all too familiar with situations in which our Elephant overpowers our Rider

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How to Bust Stress and Fears

How to Bust Stress and Fear

You know that stress is bad for you. Yet you endure it every day. Modern life is stressful. Whether it’s work, your boss, your spouse, your kids, your parents, driving or simply trying to fathom what to eat today. Your life is filled with stressors. So what can you do about it?

Imagine you are visiting a theme park

The best rides always have a long queue and you look with disdain at a group of ‘bullies’ who cut the line and push in front of you.

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Five Ways to Let Your Courage Set You Free

CourageCourage is the root of all freedom.

It takes courage to dream big dreams… no matter your past, circumstances, or what others tell you. It takes courage to go after what matters. And when the going gets tough and obstacles crop up (as they always will), it takes courage to press on. Any time you go after what you really want, your doubts and fears will surface. That’s just part of the experience. You must ignore the voices that say “turn back” or “give up now” or “this is too hard.”

It is courage that keeps you moving forward.

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3 Fears that Undermine Your Authenticity

3 fears that undermine authenticityThere’s something not quite right.

Something just isn’t sitting well in your gut.

You can’t quite place it exactly, but there is something wrong between the words and something else.

Have you ever heard the adage that communication is only 7 percent verbal and 93 percent non-verbal? Well, much of it is a pernicious myth, but there is some truth in the idea of congruence between what you say and how you say it. And when we witness a lack of congruence (in our perception) it is often that ‘gut’ feel, that sense of unease that causes us to mistrust what we are hearing.

We’ve all hidden something about ourselves from others.

We’re all tempted to “spin” to protect ourselves from some vulnerability or difficult situation. Sure, I have plenty of hidden parts, thank you. My recent intimate relationship with death has led to a great deal of mind spring-cleaning. In so doing, I’ve come across three common fears that cause us to hide some of our authenticity: rejection, exposure and vulnerability.

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6 Premortem Questions for the Perfect Presentation

Premortem the perfect presentationWelcome to this edition of the Leadership AdvantEdge Podcast and my purpose this week is to help you confidently make your next meeting or presentation perfect, and not be anxious about it.

To do that, today, I’m going to share with you how to do a premortem on your meeting or presentation by asking yourself six questions. On the show notes, I’ll share a PDF and a Word template that you can download and use to plan your next presentation or meeting premortem and make it perfect.

I have a secret to share with you. I have a fear of public speaking. Not because I don’t like to be the centre of attention, I love that. No, it’s because I’m a bit of a perfectionist. I want everything to be just so, well, perfect. And because of that, every time I have to speak in public, whether in a small group or a large auditorium, I get anxious. Sometimes a little, sometimes a lot anxious. And I’m not alone.

 

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